50 Reasons to Hate my Sister
by Hermes Salazar Snape
Summary: Apollo dotted the i's furiously as he took in the title once again. Hermes was right. Writing out those pent-up feelings gives a strange sense of satisfaction. He will not let his awesome self be hurt by his annoying baby sister.


**Author's note:**

**August 13th 2011 is Raksha Bandhan, an Indian festival that celebrates brother-sister relationships.**

**This festival always falls on the full moon in the Shravan month of the Hindu luni-solar calendar. The central ceremony involves the tying of a rakhi (sacred thread) by a sister on her brother's wrist. This symbolizes the sister's love and prayers for her brother's well-being, and the brother's lifelong vow to protect her. **

**Since my community 'Twin Sibling Love', focusses on all PJO stories dealing with the Apollo-Artemis sibling relationship, I thought I'll make use of this occasion and write a one-shot. Hope you like it!**

**50 REASONS TO HATE MY SISTER**

Apollo dotted the i's furiously as he took in the title once again. Hermes was right. Writing out those pent-up feelings gives a strange sense of satisfaction. He will not let his awesome self be hurt by his annoying baby sister.

1. I hate the fact that she is Mommy's and Daddy's favorite girl, even though I am more good-looking and talented.

2. Though she takes the form of a 12 year old, I cannot call her 'little sister' because she was _born_ before me!

3. She doesn't like me calling her 'little sister'.

4. She doesn't laugh at my cool jokes.

5. She doesn't appreciate my lovely haikus.

6. I hate it when she gives _me_ advice on how to run my life. I mean, I have the perfect life!

7. I hate her when she hurts my pride.

8. But I hate her even more when she ignores me.

9. She teases me for years together but gets absolutely crabby and doesn't talk to me when I tease her.

10. I hate it when she looks at me like I'm some repulsive slug to be crushed.

11. I hate it when she deliberately puts my demigod children in my path, as a reminder to go visit my kids once in a while.

12. I hate it when she goes on about the virtues of celibacy and staying a virgin.

13. I hate her because she tries to recruit every girl I've cheated upon.

14. I hate it when she gets into my way every Solar Eclipse.

15. I hate it when she deliberately spoils my new handsome get-to-girls look.

16. I hate it when she turns me into a donkey. Or crow. Or tree.

17. I hate it when she yells her head off for something I did long ago.

18. I hate it when she criticizes my fashion sense, my haikus, my music, my songs, my voice . . .

19. I hate the fact that she hits every target she aims for while I'm the God of Archery.

20. I hate the fact that she knows every thing about me and finds me so boring!

21. I hate it when she brings up Daphne. Or Coronis. Or Hyacinth. Or Cassandra.

22. I hate her for ever becoming _friends_ with that bloody Orion.

23. After that incident, she forgave Hermes for running away with one of her Huntresses before she forgave me for killing Orion.

24. I hate her every time I see her laughing with Hermes.

25. I hate the way she turns her puppy-dog eyes towards Father and gets away with everything.

26. I hate it much more when she turns those eyes to me and my insides all clench and feel guilty.

27. I hate the way she sometimes makes me feel, like I will do anything for her.

28. I hate the fact that she is the muse for most of my poetry.

29. I hate the fact that every time I sneak up to see her, she greets me with an arrow pointed at my face.

30. I hate her when she's so hostile when she's around her precious Huntresses.

31. I hate her because she has such _gorgeous_ Huntresses and she instructs them not to look at me.

32. I hate it when she glares at me every time I look at her Huntresses.

33. I hate the way she storms into my place and _demands_ me to do a job for her.

34. I hate the fact that even though there are muddy footprints all over my Persian rug, half my artifacts near the door are broken and she totally ruined my poetic flow, I cannot scold her because she is visiting me.

35. I hate it when she says thank you every time I help her, like I'm an outsider.

36. I hate it when she says, "Watch out, little brother."

37. I hate the fact that right after she leaves, I land nose-deep in trouble and _she_ comes and rescues me.

38. I hate it when she enjoys rubbing this in.

39. I hate her because she can always sense my presence but I cannot sense hers.

40. I hate her when someone says she loves me more than I love her.

41. I hate her because she is looking out for me as closely as I am looking out for her.

42. I hate the fact that she finds me so "stiflingly protective".

43. I hate it when she tells her problems to her Huntresses, to Father, to Mother, to Athena, to Hestia but not to me.

44. I hate the way she makes me feel when she cries, like my whole world has become dark.

45. I HATE it much more that even though she is completely heart-broken, she refuses to cry into my shoulder.

46. I hate it when she says I'm so selfish that I never care about her.

47. I hate it when she gets into trouble and I can do NOTHING about rescuing her.

48. I hate the fact that sometimes she can barely tolerate my presence but I am simply addicted to her company.

49. I hate her because she's so independent that I have no place in her life.

50. I hate her now because she just said, "I love you, dear brother. I thought you knew that. And that makes it a total of 70 I's in your list."


End file.
